Over the past several months, I have been writing a series of articles for a local magazine. I have decided to condense them into one long story here on my blog page. I sure hope you enjoy and become inspired by my experience.
Changing My Life
I should have started this article months and months ago…but as many of us do, I waited. But finally, I will take the plunge and share my story.
I never had a major problem with my weight until about 5 or 6 years ago…after the birth of my son, John. John was born with down syndrome. He is healthy in every way and such a blessing to have as a child. When he was born, my priorities shifted a little…to him, understandably. In the process, I lost myself, as many mommies do. I lost myself for a long time. I started putting on weight right after he was born.
In May 2009, I was at my highest. I am 5’2” and weighed 214.5. I was miserable inside. The shell looked happy, but inside I was so embarrassed to do anything. I would sit in the car at my children’s hockey practices and other sporting events because I didn’t want anyone to see me, or more importantly embarrass them. I would not put a swimsuit on…I wouldn’t even go to the Y and take a class because there were mirrors and I felt so bad about how I looked.
In April, I signed the whole family up for a 2 mile fun run at Hyatt’s Middle School. I couldn’t do it. I didn’t even walk the 2 miles. I QUIT. I felt so bad and embarrassed. I went and sat in the car.
In May, I was watching the last few weeks of the Biggest Loser and those girls, who weighed close to my weight had to run a half marathon…I was so inspired that I set a goal to do just that.
I prepared myself. I joined facebook and became friends with those Biggest Loser girls that inspired me. I bought an learned how to use the ipod. I joined weight watchers. I mapped out my running course…the short runs, the medium runs, and the long runs. I bought new shoes. Two pair of shoes. I read and read articles about running and what you should eat. I researched and found the perfect training schedule for me. I found the race. The a half marathon in my area that I was going to run.…and I registered….OH MY GOSH…I REGISTERED. I told everyone….EVERYONE. THERE IT WAS, THE DATE, AUGUST 15…
My training schedule was an 8 week training…in eight weeks I had to go from not being able to run 2 miles to running 13.1 miles….Could I even do that?
The training started on a Monday, June 22. I “ran” the first 2 miles. I posted that on facebook…now, when I say run, it means not walking. “Running” a 15 minute mile is not all that fast. But I wasn’t walking. The days went on. On my nonrunning days, I crosstrained. I biked. I am sure you saw me out there. BIG FAT GIRL ON BIKE PULLING A BIKE TRAILER. But I was doing it and nothing is going to stop me!...The hot summer days, were tough…but I did all the runs and all the crosstraining. I didn’t skip a day of my training. IT FELT SO GOOD TO SAY TO EVERYONE ‘I’M TRAINING FOR A HALF MARATHON’….AHHH…
The people at Weight Watcher’s were so encouraging. I met other women who were also ‘in training’ for one thing or another… I was surrounding myself with people who had a common interest with me and that was fun!
After a few weeks of running, I finally got to the portion of the training that I thought was the biggest and hardest goal of it all. RUNNING THE FIRST 10 MILES…oh, I thought I was going to die. LITERALLY…after I finished that long run on July 14, I got in my car to drive the route to confirm I ran my first 10 miles…I was so excited driving it…and couldn’t wait till the trip meter on my car turned to 10.0…I DROVE AND DROVE AND DROVE
As I came up to the end of my running route, I couldn’t believe what the odometer said…
The distance was only 9.6 miles. I was so devastated… I thought I was going to die running the 9.6 miles, how in this world was I going to run the 13.1 miles if I can’t even get this part done! (It took me 2 hours and 45 minutes) Could you imagine running for 2 hours and 45 minutes…I was going to die…and it was July and H.O.T. I had only 4 weeks left until the Dash for Donation Half Marathon.
I continued to train and attend my weight watcher’s meetings...excited and dreading the next long run all at the same time. Meanwhile, the pounds are coming off! I am feeling so good about my journey.
At the end of July, we left and went on vacation to Florida…and a cruise. OH NO…an “all you can eat” cruise. I couldn’t let that get to me. I continued to train while on vacation. When I came back home and weighed in on my weigh in day, I had lost 2.2 lbs…wow, while on vacation!
Now, I am down to two weeks left on my training. This was the week I had to run the 10 miles. I had to have a 10 mile under my belt before the race. At least, that is what all the experts say!...So I finally ran the 10 miles…it took me a long time. I had to stop at City Barbeque and ask for a cup of water. I thought I was going to die on the way back. THIS WAS HARD. But I did it. I finally ran my first 10 miles.
August 15, I got up at 5:30 am, got my race clothes on, kissed my husband and three children and I drove to Nationwide Arena, check in and got my bib number. Number 1381. It’s official. I had my number on my leg and I was ready. So I sat and wait, and go to the bathroom, and wait, and go to the bathroom again…Then there it was! Start time ~ 7 am.
I hit the five mile mark and 8:05. I called home to wake the family. I wanted to make sure they made it to the finish line on time. This was a big deal...I also called my sister in Virginia Beach and my fiend in Cleveland…believe me, I didn’t really talk…just words coming out as I was breathing…when I got to mile 10, I called home again…my daughter says “Dad, she is at mile 10, we gotta go”…
The last three miles were, I think the easiest…just know this was all going to be over soon!
As I approach the last mile, the crowds were getting thicker, the cheers were getting louder, and my calves were burning deeper…but the excitement was there…I was going to finish…
The last ½ mile a spectator, a teenage boy, jumped in and ran next to me, I really didn’t need that, but maybe I LOOKED like I needed that…that was nice of him, so whoever you were, thank you! As I approach the finish line, I kept looking for my family, I didn’t see them, but was sure they would be there…I ran cross that finish line, then went back to ask what my time was…it was 2:52:48. That was pretty good…I was 3rd from last. And the last two were walkers. I didn’t care… I did not stop running and that was my only goal. I finished. I was crying.
As I turn to look around to see my family, I see my dear friend Jennifer Simon, and her husband, Craig, and son, Mark…They came down just to see and support me! That was so nice of them… I had to take a seat and rest my legs, so we sat on a bench just at the finish line for a few minutes. I see my family drive up and stop at the street light…They didn’t make it in time…BUMMER. I was so disappointed…but understood my husband doesn’t deal with all three children that often…so his timing was a little off…
My children ran up, gave me a big hug and kiss and told me how proud they were of me…
After a day or two of recuperating, I decided, I couldn’t stop there…there was another race in two weeks and wanted to do that one too…so I registered for my next one on August 30.
What was I thinking? Another 13.1 miles in two weeks? Could I physically do that? I continued to run, but just little 3, 4, or 5 mile run. I was still having to weigh in at my weight watcher’s meeting, so the exercise had to continue.
Word got around in the neighborhood among friends that I was running half marathons, so I was getting a lot of inspiration and inquiries from people whom I didn’t really know.
One of them was Gail Cook. She is a runner. She is thin. She is a mom of 5. She is a single mom of 5. She works. She was my inspiration at different times during this training period. She decided she wanted to run the half marathon as well. I was so excited to be sharing this with someone.
As race day approached, I was getting more nervous than before. My goal was to finish faster than my other race. My previous race was 2:52:48. All I wanted to do was finish faster.
Gail picked me up in the morning when it was still dark. As we drove down to where the start line is, we talked about our strategy. Well, she talked about her strategy…I didn’t really have one. Mine was just to maintain my pace. She was starting in the 8 min pace… I was starting in the back. The rules were that you could not bring your ipod, so I didn’t. Gail brought hers. I was worried about that, because I hadn’t ran or trained without music…The official rules state that if you are caught with an ipod or any ear devices, you will be removed from the race.
While standing in the back waiting for the race to start, there was this man trying to come thru all the standing racers. He was in a wheelchair. He looked fit, very fit. I was feeling so sorry for this man. No one could hear him because he was sitting down low in his chair. So I decided to take it upon myself and lead the way for him. I got in front of him and turned and said…”don’t worry, I am here to help, I will lead you thru this crowd” I started walking and calling out “excuse me, racer coming thru” and I felt so proud that I was leading this man thru all these people. Everyone started moving to the side and smiling and clapping for him. I was proud of him. He got to the beginning of the line and I turned to leave. He wished me luck and I did the same for him. Everyone in the immediate crowd also clapped for me, just for helping him. My heart felt full.
I went back to my spot in the crowd and just waited the few minutes for it to start. While standing there, I see these girls with their ipods and asked them about the rules. They said that if you are in a “winning position” and they see your ipods you are then disqualified. Since we are not competing for a cash prize, it should be ok.
This race starts at Macy’s parking lot and goes all the way to Nationwide Arena. Wow, that is far. The horn goes off, and as usual, I cry with pride…wow, this is my second half marathon in two weeks! As we start running, my body temperature warms up and they layers start coming off. Before I knew it is was in a full sweat with the sweatshirt tied around my waste…the run felt great. At the halfway point, where the relay teams were making their connections, I see one of my weight watcher’s friends. She was running the first part of the relay and was finished…she yelled my name and said “way to go”…that gave me a boost for a few more miles. The run was beautiful. It was basically up Riverside Drive along the river most of the way. Some of it, just a small portion, was offroad, then by the parks area…the run seem to take forever. Portions of the run were uphill. That was hard. I didn’t stop running, but my pace slowed a little. The water stations ran out of water. I ran 6 miles before there was a station with water. Finally. The burning in my throat was beginning to be unbearable.
Along the route, I saw many tossed or lost items. I saw several shirts, a pedometer, earbuds, and even a pair of shoes. I don’t know if they were a racers shoes, but felt bad if they were!
I finally get closer to the end. I forgot my cell phone this time, so I had no clue what my time was going to be. I felt good. I felt like I was running faster, but I wasn’t sure exactly what it was going to be. I turned the corner and saw the end of the route…boy I was glad…
I was so excited to see the finish line up ahead. I just knew my family was going to be there THIS TIME. I come closer and closer to the finish line, getting a second wind. Feeling like I was on air because I was running “so fast” (really, just running as fast as I could)…I came to the finish line and saw my time…I was so happy! It was looking good…so I ran faster and faster…I crossed the finish line at 2:39:02. Thirteen minutes faster than my race two weeks prior…wow. 13 minutes.
As I turn to my right, I see my daughter, Blossom (11) and John (5) sitting there waiting for me….they hugged and congratulated me…I asked where daddy was, Blossom said “he just walked to the car for a minute”….Darn it…he missed me again!...i was so bummed…he came back and we reenacted me crossing the finish line…
I was tired.
2:39:02 – I was proud.
We went and picked up a few things from the free food section….we got in the car and came home…I was tired and didn’t want to do anything else!
I was very excited about racing. I called my sister in Virginia Beach and told her my time. She convinced me I should go to Virginia Beach and run in the half marathon…only one problem, it was only 6 days away!
I checked my schedule and worked it all out…I registered for the race!...The Rock n Roll half marathon was September 6…
ROCK-N- ROLL HERE I COME… A few days before I was planning to leave for Virginia Beach, I was trying to look my best in my new “skinny” body. I went to a local spa to get a body wrap. I am not sure that anything really happened though. Well, I DID fall asleep and have a great little nap while lying there…
I bought new socks. Special running socks to help massage my feet. They were my favorite color, pink!
I left for Virginia Beach September 4. Blossom and John came with me. We left from the rink where Blossom had hockey practice. The drive was long. I was starting to feel sick. There was this bad taste in my mouth. I couldn’t figure out what was happening. I was concerned because that is a sign of diabetes and it runs in my family. I had a little nephew at 1 ½ that had to start with insulin (he is doing well now). I called my sister (the mother of the little boy) she said “oh, I am sure you are fine.” I said “no seriously, I tasted something.” She said, “well, maybe your body is releasing toxins or something” – that was it. The lady at the spa sprayed Amino Acid on me during the wrap and said that it would release toxins…I just didn’t know I would taste it! That was a relief. We continued to drive till late in the night. We stopped somewhere in West Virginia and spent the night in a hotel. I didn’t really sleep. I was so excited.
The next morning we were on the road for just a few minutes and I got stopped for speeding. CRAP. I am not a speeder. I don’t drive fast. I was on a two lane on ramp (thinking it was the freeway entrance) but it wasn’t. It was another street taking me to the on ramp. As soon as I saw the speed limit sign, I slowed down from my “freeway” speed, but it was too late…I already had red and blue lights flashing in my rear view!
We finished the 600+ mile drive mid-day Saturday…we arrived at my sister’s house, said our hello’s and headed straight for the Virginia Beach Expo Center. The registered racer’s had to pick up their own race packet. My sister, Amy, dropped me off at the door of the expo center and I ran in. I quickly got in line to get my bib. I was racer number 23,700…THIS WAS EXCITING. There was hundreds of competitor’s hustling around shopping, tasting, chatting, and sampling.
I went back to the car because Blossom and John stayed there with Amy. I was enjoying the view of Virginia Beach. It is just a little different than Columbus, so I was taking it all in…
Amy and Blossom came back to the car. Amy was so excited. She wanted to run. So she decided to go in and register for Rock n Roll Half Marathon Virginia Beach 2010. She also had a little surprise for me, but said I couldn’t have it till after the race.
We went out to Olive Garden for my prerace meal (of course, fettucini) While waiting there, two couples arrived in OHIO STATE jerseys!...so we chatted and they were surprised that I, a buckeye?, was there with while they were there (they were from Akron) After we loaded up we went back to Amy’s house and we played Wii. This was my first time playing that little amazing game. It was so fun. We started with tennis. Then moved to bowling…that was a big mistake. On my first time, I stepped too wide, and pulled a groin muscle. I couldn’t even stand up to bowl again…I was so upset…I couldn’t believe it. I sat on the sofa and just relaxed my leg for awhile.
John and I were the first two to go to bed…After all, I had a big day ahead of me.
I forget how early I woke the next morning, but it was early. My leg hurt. I had to continue to stretch and massage my muscle. I put on my new lucky pink racing socks, slipped on my newly broken in running shoes. Amy drove me to the start line and dropped me off. It was still dark. Loads and loads of people were pouring out of the shuttle buses…There were 20,000 racers. My I got in line to go to the bathroom. This is very important. I don’t want to be stopping during the race. I kept checking the time. I arrived way too early. I was at the start line before 6…it was a long wait till 7 – or so it seemed.
I heard music so I walked over to where all the excitement was and joined in that fun. The announcer was introducing the professional runners. Then he introduced this one special man. I didn’t catch his name, but he had a story. This man was a homeless man. He had been homeless for 2 years in Virginia Beach. Two years ago, something happened to him where he decided to change his life. He started running. He got a job. He got 2 jobs. He rented a house. He decided to accept a huge challenge and train for a half marathon. He was crying as he told his story. I did too. The man said that he is more scared today than he had ever been sleeping on the street. The announcer then said something to him that was so true. He said “why are you scared?” The man said “because this is hard.” The announcer said “No, THIS IS THE EASY PART, the training was the hard part…all those days and all those miles ran, they are all over, this is the moment you were waiting for…it will be over in 13.1 miles.” WOW. I HAD NEVER THOUGHT OF IT LIKE THAT. HE WAS 100% RIGHT. That put a whole new perspective on this for me.
There were so many runners that we all had a corral number, based on our time. We were told to go to our corral and get ready for a good, good time! It is about 6:45 am. I head down to corral 23. At 7 am the first corral was released and every 30 seconds, another would go. IT WAS 7:43 BEFORE I WAS RELEASED…I arrived before 6! I was already tired.
The music was loud, the spectators were cheering us on, and the racers were ready! My whistle went off and I was off running my 3rd half marathon in 4 weeks!
The sun was beaming down. The sun was bright. It was hot. My skin was that salty kinda dirty feeling you get when you are at the beach. My legs ached. I was sweating. Sweat was dripping from my eyebrows into my eyes and burning. I was feeling defeated.
IT WAS TOUGH FROM THE GET GO. My groin muscle ached with every step forward. I was regretting doing this already. How was I going to be able to run the 13.1 miles. Darn Wii!
I am not a quitter.
I started to think about all the hard work I had put into this. The hours. The miles. The long drive.
The first ½ mile was up hill. It was uphill because we were passing over an overpass. I thought “how ridiculous they would do this at the beginning”. Before I knew it, I was at mile 3. The bands played at the halfway point between the water stations. Each band seemed to have their own genre. The first one was country. A Toby Keith song played from the National Guard Sponsored water station. The song was, “The Angry American”… which filled me with pride… and got me pumped up for another mile. I thought “great…maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad after all. I was slowing down at each water station, as that is key to have to avoid muscle cramps.
As I came upon mile 4, I saw the elite runners returning! I was thinking, “wow, they are almost done and I still have almost halfway to go.” I was getting frustrated at the people in front of me. They were running slower than I and I found it very difficult to pass them. If I passed them, they would run a little faster and pass me back, then slow down…You know who those type of people are. Just like the drivers that hurry to get in front of you, then slow down. It was frustrating.
Just before I decided to take off for a quick 15 second fast run to avoid that group, this lady tripped on a reflector and face planted on the pavement. She was a heavier girl. She hit so hard, I felt it! She ripped the skin off her knee. I wanted to stop and help, but there was nothing I could do. That is why the medics are there anyway. She limped over to the side for help.
I made it past the group that was holding me back and was going at a good pace. I was tired though. My inner thigh ached. At around mile 5, I was getting ready to pass this girl. She was a tiny girl. I was proud of this “little girl” attempting to do this race. She looked like she was about the age of 9. As I approached her, I noticed she had on some pretty funny looking flip flops. How could she be running in flip flops. As I got closer, I then thought here feet look kind of funny. Then I realized her shoes had been decorated and painted. They looked skin tone, with French pedicure, a toe ring, and the flip flop straps. They were painted to look like a foot! I was just behind her in ear shot . I said ”cute shoes” – when she turned around, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. This “little girl” had down syndrome. She said “thanks, my gramma did them for me.” Now understand, I am not amazed that a down syndrome person could race, but I knew the dedication and determination that went into my own training and was amazed that she could comprehend those long training hours and commit herself to doing such a task. I WAS SO PROUD. I just kept thinking, that I hope to one day run a half marathon with my down syndrome son. I slowed down just a tad so that I could talk with her. I told her I was so proud of her and that she was doing an amazing job. I asked if she was going to run the entire half or was she in a relay. She said that she signed up for the entire half, but was getting pretty tired. I asked where she was from and how old she was. She was from Virginia Beach and she was 23. I was really mad at myself for prejudging this “little girl” – This “little girl” was a grown woman who is attempting what many people don’t even consider. That pulled on my heart strings and gave ME the courage to continue with a bounce in my step!
At mile 8, we start going into KOA campgound area of the run. That was such a blessing…the shade! I could smell campers’ cooking their breakfast….aaahhh the smell of bacon. There were cheerleaders cheering us on at the water station areas…they were dressed in costumes and were competing for our votes as they were vying for a cash prize.
At mile 9, we run thru Camp Pendleton. That was interesting. There were men in uniform standing guard opening the gate for us. I can’t remember much about the base, other than it was very tidy and clean.
I get to mile 10, and it looped in an “S” formation. I could see where I was going to be about 10 minutes and dreaded the run. I didn’t want to see that. It made it seem SO LONG. As I was at the end of the “S” part, I came upon this girl who was wearing an interesting shirt. On the back, at the bottom, it read “DOES THIS MAKE MY BUTT LOOK FAST” – I thought it read “DOES THIS MAKE MY BUTT LOOK FAT! I said “cute shirt and no it doesn’t make your butt look fat” – SHE QUICKLY CORRECTED ME! I want one of those shirts!
The sun was beaming down. The sun was bright. It was hot. My skin was that salty kinda dirty feeling you get when you are at the beach. My legs ached. I was sweating. Sweat was dripping from my eyebrows into my eyes and burning. I was feeling like a competitor.
My groin muscle still ached with every stride. My calf muscles were starting to cramp because I was not running my normal way due to the groin pain. It was getting painful.
Approaching mile 11, I thought I was done. I couldn’t deal with this cramping calf, the groin pain and I was so thirsty. I didn’t see a water station close…I was so thirsty…and darn there was the other side of that over pass…I had to go over…there wasn’t “an alternate running path” – this was going to be over. I was not going to finish. I just slowed a little, but still in a running pace. I am not a quitter. One of the spectators was passing out orange slices to the runners. No one immediately around me was taking them, so I asked for some…THOSE WERE THE BEST TASTING ORANGES I THINK I HAD EVER EATEN….THEY WERE SO FULL OF JUICE. IT WAS RUNNING DOWN MY HANDS…THAT IS WHAT I NEEDED…JUST SOMETHING TO TAKE MY MIND OFF THE ACHES.
I get to mile 11 and now I am in the home stretch…I WAS IN THE HOME STRETCH…Then I hear someone yelling my name…I COULD NOT BELIEVE IT…MY SISTER, BLOSSOM, AND JOHN were there cheering me on…I was so happy…that meant so much to me…and pushed me thru to the finish line. I waved and they snapped a photo as I ran.
At mile 12.5, I could hear the crowds yelling out words of encouragemenet…and I was hurting so bad I couldn’t even smile back… I was grimacing at this point. I was in pain. It hurt too bad to run. It hurt too bad to walk. It hurt too bad to stop! My options were: 1) to go out on a stretcher; 2) to walk the remaining 1.6 miles with the pain; or 3) to run the 1.6 miles with the pain. I chose number 3….GET THIS OVER WITH!
As I approach mile 13…I am dying of thirst. My mouth is as dry as a desert. I can’t even swallow…I turn left to enter the last .1 and I see a big tub of bagged ice…I grabbed one, bit the end off and sucked the water out. I couldn’t get enough!
I am running up the board walk. The beautiful Atlantic Ocean is on my right. Shops and people were on my left. The finish line was in sight. I could hear the announcers. I wanted to speed up but I couldn’t. My legs were hurting too bad. I ran as best I could to get to the finish line. I CROSS THE FINISH LINE AT 2:49:29. I was 10 minutes slower than my previous race a week earlier. My Goal was to finish faster than my previous fastest time. I knew that wasn’t going to happen once the leg pain started…but I FINISHED.
As I crossed the finish line, I see my sister, Blossom, and John, I run over to them. I stopped for a quick second, but I just had to walk. My calves were hurting so bad. They were actually hurting more than my groin muscle and hurting more now when I stopped walking. I had to continue to walk…
We stopped and took pictures…In the picture it looks like I am smiling…IT’S A GRIMACE!
The sun was beaming down. The sun was bright. It was hot. My skin was that salty kinda dirty feeling you get when you are at the beach. My legs ached. I was sweating. Sweat was dripping from my eyebrows into my eyes and burning. I was feeling like a WINNER and can’t wait till my next Virginia Beach Rock N Roll Half Marathon September 5, 2010!
When we returned home, my sister, gave me the surprise she had picked up at the expo the previous day. It was the official RNR Virginia Beach poster, autographed and personalized by the artist. The personalization reads…To Patricia: You rocked, you ran, you finished!
Yes I did.
The winner does what is right and then feels good about it. A whiner wants to feel good but doesn't want to do the work to do what's right.
